Forgiveness for Sale

Lately, I've been contemplating forgiveness. I wondered is it something that should be freely given, or should it be given when requested. I received a few answers that cleared up some confusion.

First off, forgiveness is just as much for the forgiver as the forgivee. When someone truly wholeheartedly forgives another, it relieves the burden of any sort of grudge, anger, and harsh feelings. My favorite verse to describe this is Colossians 1:22 "Yet now he has reconciled you to himself through the death of Christ in his physical body. As a result, he has brought you into his own presence, and you are holy and blameless as you stand before him without a single fault." NLT. When we truly, lovingly forgive someone, through God, within us, should see others this way. Not only are we giving the "Okay," and undeserved and unconditional love, but it as much helps the forgiver continue to grow and love.

Second, is forgiveness supposed to be earned? I know a lot of people who think respect needs to be earned, but does someone have to earn forgiveness. Does a petitioning forgivee have to correct their mistakes or compensate the forgiver to earn forgiveness. In my opinion, and what God has laid on me, is that the word is not "forearness", rather "forgiveness". Wikipedia defines forgiveness as "the process of concluding resentment, indignation or anger as a result of a perceived offense, difference or mistake, or ceasing to demand punishment or restitution." Thus, by definition, forgiving someone requires the exclusion of any requests of repayment or punishment. In other words, forgiveness is not earned. That is not to say that someone asking forgiveness should not be willing to compensate or pay a price, but it should an offering, not a request.

Third, for a while I thought, "Well, I don't have to forgive so-and-so, he never asked me to forgive him." I realized that forgiveness isn't something we pay forward. It is already there, before the event even happened. It just exists. It's kind of like love, there is no past tense of love, it either is or isn't. You either love someone forever, or you never did in the first place. Forgiveness is not kind of like love. Forgiveness is love. I heard a pastor once say that he was talking with someone about God, and the person said, I'm paraphrasing this "I know He'll forgive me for my sins in the past, but what about the sins that may happen in the future," and the pastor said "when Jesus died for your sins, none of them were in the past. Jesus paid the price for all our sins before they ever happened. They were all in the future." To be more like Christ, is it possible to have existing forgiveness, that it is already there before anything happens, and it exists in abundance. Matthew 18:22 tells us to forgive 70, 77, and 7 x 70 times, depending on which version you prefer to read. Regardless, it is abundant.

And just remember when you think you cannot forgive someone, through God, anything is possible. It may take time, patience, strength, and love, but God always provides.